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Taking a deeper look at current and past films and how they relate to the world today.

Jonathan Kim is an independent film critic who writes and produces film reviews for Uprising and other outlets. He is a former co-producer at Brave New Films.

Read his reviews online at ReThinkReviews.net. Watch his videos at www.youtube.com/user/jsjkim, and follow him on Twitter at twitter.com/ReThinkReviews. ReThink Reviews’ theme song is by Restavrant.

Friends With Kids

In 1989, the film ‘When Harry Met Sally…’ decided to take what was, at the time, a pretty modern look at gender relationships by asking whether a man and woman could ever be platonic friends. Since ‘When Harry Met Sally…’ is a romantic comedy, the answer was basically, “Sure, until they eventually fall in love and end up living happily ever after.” Still, this was a seminal film that sparked millions of conversations, and no film has come as close to taking a similar look at the heterosexual male/female relationship. That is, until now. The new film ‘Friends With Kids’ takes the premise of ‘When Harry Met Sally…’ to it’s next logical step, accepting that men and women can be friends, but going further to ask whether male and female friends can raise a child together with no sex, marriage, or divorce.

The couple in question are serial dater Jason (played by Adam Scott) and good girl Julie (played by the film’s writer/director Jennifer Westfeldt). Friends since college, Jason and Julie are now in their 30s and live in the same building, where they lead the kind of perfect New York lifestyles we’ve grown accustomed to seeing in movies and TV shows, full of sharp outfits, beautiful apartments, hip restaurants, and attractive friends, consisting of comfy married couple Leslie and Alex (played by Maya Rudolph and Chris O’Dowd) and passionate, sexy newlyweds Ben and Missy (played by Jon Hamm and Kristen Wiig).

But this urban utopia is quickly shattered when Leslie and Alex reveal that they’re pregnant, but promise that nothing will change and they’ll stay the same hip, cool friends they always were. But flash forward four years, and Leslie and Alex are living a decidedly unhip life in Brooklyn, never going out, fighting, exhausted, and with the passion drained from their marriage. Ben and Missy have also gotten married and have a baby, but all of their sizzle has turned to resentment and spite.

Jason and Julie each want to have children, but aren’t attracted to each other and don’t want to end up like their married friends. So they devise a shortcut — they’ll become a happily divorced couple without the marriage or divorce, sharing child-rearing duties while continuing to enjoy their single lives. While their friends consider this a backhanded insult and a critique on their married lives, they can’t argue with the results, though obstacles eventually arise, especially when Jason and Julie enter relationships with people who seem to be perfect for them.

Since ‘Friends With Kids’ is, at its heart, a romantic comedy, you can probably guess how it ends. But I have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this film, which has great, very natural performances and dialogue that actually feels like you’re overhearing real conversations. The jokes come fast and funny, but it’s the kind of humor that would come organically from witty adults spending time together.

While republicans claim that marriage is some sort of perfect castle that must be defended from committed gay couples who seek to destroy it, it’s pretty clear that heterosexuals have done a pretty good job of wrecking it on their own, with a national divorce rate somewhere close to 50%, give or take a few points. With most people having witnessed or lived through the pitfalls of marriage, more Americans are seeking to define their relationships for themselves by waiting longer to get married, living together longer, or remaining in committed relationships without ever tying the knot. Where the stigma used to be having a child out of wedlock or not getting married, the new stigma is against being unhappy and unfulfilled in a bad marriage and messing up your child because of it.

The reason why Julie and Jason’s plan to raise a child with their best friend is initially met with such disapproval and skepticism isn’t because their plan seems so crazy, but because of the realities of most modern marriages, as well as those of their friends, that it initially seems almost too sane.

‘Friends With Benefits’ is rated R and opens today.